For my husband’s last neurologist appointment, I sent a message to the doctor before the appointment. I updated her on how he’s doing. Although she and I didn’t talk one on one, she mentioned a couple of the more positive things I said so I knew she had gotten my message. I have messaged her before about meds, etc.

At my husband’s doctors office, there is a sign on the wall that says tell the nurse if you want to see the doctor alone. I shake my head yes and the nurse takes my husband to one room while I go into another room where the doctor and I can talk alone and then we join my husband in his room where the doctor talks to him. It works great.

I type easy short sentences about what is going on with my husband when we go to a doctor's visit. It is almost in outline form with headings so the doctor can scrolldown quickly. The doctor always asks to make a copy. I tell doctor it is for him. He then asks questions or directs us from there.
I have to rewrite several times before giving doctor my letter. I don't want to ramble. Doctors don't have time for stories and will ignore. I also do this for when I go to doctor. My husband is used to me doing this and doesn't get suspicious.

Yes, I use the patient portal too (my chart). Also Ken signed something at his pcp’s office giving me access to his information there.

If you have a patient portal to your primary care doctor, I have found it very useful to update him on what is happening. It's private and I can be open and honest. Be aware that since it's about my husband, I found that he has to answer to my husband's portal. Since he can't use the computer anymore, I can access it with his password. I have also had a private word with the nurse. I hope this is helpful.