You might be surprised what makes your loved one happy. Alzheimers is harder on us than it is on the patient. I asked my father what made him happy today. He said the chocolate milk made him happy. I told him we are going to start a jar and every day he is going to write down or we will write down for him, one thing that made him happy on that day. After a few months, we are going to read all of the things that made him happy. I saw this idea on face book and it sounds like a great idea.

Hello Alison, I do understand your question. I believe we have to do the best we can to help them maintain quality of life as long as we can. There may come a point when we have to make very difficult decisions about critical health care but that won't really involve any of the medications that may slow the dementia. That I know of, there are no medications that actually extend the lives of people with AD or other dementia.

My husband was diagnosed with bladder cancer last summer but only simple removal and followup treatment were needed so we took care of that. Chemotherapy or radiation treatments or major surgery would have posed more difficult decisions as that would have significantly impacted his quality of life. While I don't think he is capable of making his own medical decisions, I felt he was not ready to give up on his life. I'm not one for extending life when the quality is not good but "quality of life" has different meaning for everyone. and I do agree that it becomes very different when you have dementia. My husband is sometimes still able to thank me at the end of the day for helping him and he can laugh and have fun for prolonged periods of time. Those are important measures to me. Sorry for rambling but this is an ongoing issue we must deal with on a regular basis.

I am a Nurse for some 40+ YEARS and I have asked myself that question often. My husband of 46 years was recently diagnosed with Dementia/Alzheimer's and is on Aricept and a Drug Study at the University of Iowa. He wanted to participate in the study and is willing to put up with any side effects the meds may have. I think for now, it gives me and my two daughters time to come to grips with things. Also, we had time to get any paperwork done, that was necessary. His life quality isn't bad, so we wait and see. If things get worse, even with medication, we will address that when the time comes. I think it is best to play it by ear. One thing I know is he doesn't want a feeding tube like his Mom had because that just prolongs the inevitable. Chances are there will be no cure in his Lifetime, but the good news, he is contributing to helping others for now.,

Hi, I have done that and asked Mum very specific questions, have gone through the day naming all the things she has done, eaten eaten and all I ever get is her saying she doesnt remember, she can then get upset that she cant recall a a thing. As with everything about alz its so individual. These days I dont ask her as chances of her getting upset and feeling bad are high. hugs

yes its so important. Mum never wanted to have the conversation however from talking about what happens to others she always said the same thing. I wonder sometimes how the directive was ever done as she is now 85 and find her generation find it impossible to talk about.
Am so glad the directive was done albeit a battle to get done. I didnt think too much about it back then but as alz has progressed I now see how very important it is. hugs