Oh, I kinda forgot this! No idea how I forgot but I did! Please read on - it still makes me laugh.
My mum became a thief! She was in a dementia unit so everyone had dementia and they all wandered in and out of each other's rooms. It started with towels. She'd take piles of clean towels from other residents' bathrooms and from housekeeping trolleys and store them in her wardrobe. When the staff ran out of towels, they went to her room! One Christmas, she started taking boxes of chocolates from other people's rooms and sharing them with everyone. She moved on to toothbrushes. Random. She stole all the toothbrushes she could find. Then bars of soap. One night, she'd been up all night. The staff went to check on her and found her EATING a bar of soap that she'd taken from someone's room! She had an allergic reaction to something in the soap so the staff had to call emergency services. They declared her OK after a dose of antihistamine. It was during COVID but they let me in to visit her. She had some swelling due to the allergic reaction. She looked like she'd had bad lip fillers! She was 85 and had huge, pillowy lips that were so out of proportion I was snorting with laughter every time she looked away from me. Honestly, it's probably my favourite memory as I know she'd have found it hilarious were she well enough to understand.
The care home fitted lockable cabinets in all bathrooms, banned solid soap and, to this day, every new staff member receives extensive training on the dangers of soap!!!

I think the on going grief that happens with the decline s the speech loss, the loss of identity yours and his not knowing or being able to respond in a way you can’t determine what his thoughts are. Seeing The loss of ADLs . And now after 11 years of cares you don’t remember the sound of sweet I love you’s ! shared ! You know it’s still there but can’t be voiced or expressed. on his part, I have a recording from 2017 and 2018 at Christmas Us sharing the (Merry Christmas and I love you )It’s so wonderful to hear his voice say it so clearly! So if you have the chance record what you can it may bring tears but it is a keep sake . Jan

Dear Bobbiekay1 & Richard10, Thank you for letting me as a caregiver understand better what my LO is going through. Wishing you both many more years of enjoying life and much love and support from everyone in your life. Take care.

Hello PamStapula,
I concur with you strongly that we must be an active advocate. It frustrates me that despite many years of failed drug based treatments that alternative and emerging therapies are not researched. However, a glimmer of light is showing with a few centres trialling Near Infrared light therapy (Photobiomodulation) to treat Alzheimers with good results. The inclusion of NIR light therapy in the treatment definitely helps. I encourage loved ones and all to explore Centres that are trialling and offering NIR light therapy.
My brother-in-law was diagnosed in 2018 when his early symptoms were non-communicative and memory lost. He was lucky to enroll in a trial using a helmet design that emits NIR light at 1070 nano-meters wave length. After 8 weeks of twice daily treatments, he regained his social skills and memory. Everyone was amazed to see him gained his normal self.
We purchased 2 light devices, the Helmet design for the brain and another belt design to threat the body systems - gut brain, energy and immune systems. It's now 6 years past and his conditions are still stable. The treatment management includes medication, diet and exercises. Lately, we have employed a personal carer for 6 hours a day to follow a wellness routine and supervise the light treatments. Since June 2024 at age 81 years, he started swimming till present This program helps him to remain stable and still enjoys life. Additionally important, it offers my sister some respite. I am monitoring his progress since diagnosis in 2018. Indeed, an experience of hope from a holistic approach that embraces Light Therapy will offer hope and improve quality and wellness for patients and families.

Over the course of Dementia I have learned that I MUST be an active advocate- with primary, specialists and staff at housing. Way to go on the research!