@A myALZteam Member You seem to have the exact opposite to my worries. My wife has lost every initiative in the eating department, and I have to prepare and give her everything whole day long. I (like what @A myALZteam Member writes) try to give her as much protein as I can, like an 8 ounce steak or chicken breast, or two standard portions of salmon as the evening meal, served with potato, rice or pasta. From the Mediterranean diet (it's where we have retired) I have adopted the habit to cook the meat or fish with vegetables and/or fruit, to make it juicy and tasty. Breakfast is a 2-eggs omelette simmered with some left-overs and a drizzle of sweet and sour sauce. For lunch I just improvise something.

Over the last 10 years or so, my wife has steadily lost about 6 pounds per year on average (typical for the pre-clinical stage of AD), thanks to God I had kept enough records to work this out. Two years ago she was diagnosed with ALZ or similar, and a year ago our doctor alerted me to her alarmingly low weight, BMI 18, which is underweight. That's when I became a full time chef, as she has never any great interest in cooking, and would not do it for herself, an apple a day with icecream is her idea of nutrition.

HERE IS MY MAIN ADVICE. Try to get your dad on the scales every morning, and record the weight. Watch the long term trend and discuss with your doctor what his ideal weight should be. With these WEIGHT RECORDS I can see when to throttle up the food supply. In your case, I would be curious to see if your dad's appetite actually translates into weight increase. If his weight is steady at a correct BMI then I would not worry too much. As Helen5's article says, treats could be their only pleasure left. With my wife I often treat her to a generous portion of icecream after doing our shopping, she always appreciates this immensely.

YOU ALSO ASK: "When I create a meal, should I divide the meal in half for another meal? Groceries seems to be more expensive with my dad. How do others divide or recoup some or most of the cost?" I would suggest do some basic book keeping. Meats have up to 25% protein, so you can work out how much the required amount costs in $/Lbs for most cuts you like. I have found that chicken breast and salmon are most economical, with some affordable steak thrown in a few times a week. Imho fresh fruits or veg are not a bad choice moneywise, compared to canned or frozen. Buy what's in season, and local.

Divide the meal in half? Yes, I do that if I can, and there is space left in the fridge. And I never ever throw food away. Finally, with your dad present there is just one more person to feed, so that will increase the grocery bill accordingly. To "recoup cost" could come from buying in larger quantities and hope for economies of scale.

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A myALZte...

A myALZte...

My husband’s eating habits changed as well. I realized there was a problem when I put a dish of sour cream/chives for baked potatoes on the table and he ate it before his meal was served. If I put the whole meal in front of him, he would eat it all. Even the time between meals got screwed up. Maybe you could determine an appropriate portion and only serve that.

My husband’s eating habits have changed also. It’s quite common. He doesn’t like things he used to, and will do weird things like put honey on pizza. I also had to hide the sweets. He has put on a lot of weight. If he wants a snack, the only thing readily accessible is bananas on the counter. I also had to start dishing up our plates and don’t put them on the table until I’m ready to sit down or it might be gone before I sit down. I also don’t put desert on the table because he will eat that first and steal mine too. He will eat most of the food on his plate. Sometimes when we go out to eat, he will want something and then only eat a couple of bites. I’ve noticed that he doesn’t do well with sandwiches. He will eat the top bun, but doesn’t want to eat anything else. I have also noticed that I have to cut up his pizza into bite sized pieces. Now I order his hamburger without a bun and cut it up for him. However, he will eat a brat in the bun. I will give him a sweet for desert, sometimes a cookie or a fun size candy bar. You just need to watch his eating habits, and do what is necessary to get a good diet in him with limited sweets. I agree that as they get toward the end of life and they aren’t eating, you give them whatever you can get into them.

@A myALZteam Member You asked: "Do you work at home @A myALZteam Member? Who takes care of your wife when you work?" Well, the answer is I am a 78 yr old retired scientist with one arthritic knee. So several problems. My wife (about stage 4 Alz) who is also retired (a former hypnotherapist), and aged 76 likes to make long walks, and I can barely make a mile. So we are at home a lot. Recently she made some falls and early signs of incontinence, so making walks is now even less attractive for me. But we have a son, who lives in London (UK), and does all his work from home, he works for an IT company, and they don't mind if he visits us and works from our apartment in S of France (Montpellier), so all day he is in our kitchen, on the phone and at his double screen computer. He is currently here for a month, and takes my wife out in all his spare time. While he is with my wife, I am busy getting our apartment kitted out better (we bought it during Covid, and did not do much doing-up during the lockdown and then ALZ took over. We had never planned any of this, but events took over, like being assets-rich but cash-poor, Covid and, did I mention ALZ?

I am glad you work so well on getting things sorted out; at my age it's all a bit slower, but, we all have faith that eventually things will be perfect!!! Have a Happy XMas!

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A myALZte...

A myALZte...

Older people lose the sense of taste and often spice their food differently than younger people. We also absorb and digest food less efficiently. At the end of life, very little left, in terms of vices! Pleasure foods, mixed with fruits, etc. Give balance but not too restrictive.