You get angry because you’re human… tired, frustrated and truly have no definitive answers regarding your spouse’s condition. ALZ researchers are no closer to answers today than they were 100 years ago when this disease was stigmatized as senility. ALZ is anyone’s disease however, it’s an individual journey. The difficulty is the loss of someone still in your presence. Please remember it’s much more difficult for your spouse.than you…. individuals with cognitive brain disorders are struggling with an internal battle constantly. They know something is wrong, without a clue, they are trying to figure things out, an impossibility yet their ongoing internal war. Never show your impatience, even if you have to step away, breathe or call someone. Any display of impatience can cause indescribable pain to your loved one. There are so many forms of Alzheimer’s/Dementia and so few answers. We don’t truly know what individuals with these diseases understand, absorb or the pain they disguise feeling hurt believing they are a bother…sure, these factors come and go, oftentimes fleeting, yet we caregivers never know what’s in their minds at any given moment. Care should be given with love, trust, understanding, dignity, respect, diligence and a sincere desire to be a caregiver. ALZ does not discriminate, it attacks. No One On This Earth Is Exempt. No you don’t need therapy, you need information, support from ALZ Team Members and other social media groups of this nature. We collectively have answers, ears, suggestions, and are willing to share with you our findings, failures and successes that we’ve encountered traveling this ALZ caregiver journey. We view mistakes as learning tools. Be Blessed 😇

Some days are harder than others for sure. It's like putting your finger in a light socket: every thing you do is wrong! I'm trying so hard to stay calm no matter what. I know Hubs is frustrated too. Not a fun journey: just try to do the best we can every day. I had him ride along to the grocery again today. He waits in the car & watches people. It's an outing.

Very well put - and I will keep that last thought close to my heart as its exactly what I'm trying to do. Thank you.

Pray for patience & strength.

Adjusting to a diagnosis of alzheimers is very hard. Your hubby is there, but he's not. All those things you depended on him for are changing and diminishing, emotionally and physically. As the disease progresses , you realize how much they gave you. It's such a diametric experience ....you realize your loss as it happens.
Your anger and frustration is adaptive and likely reactive to your experience of loss and change. The process of accepting and adjusting to the fact that they can't help it takes time. Yes, we shouldn't argue with them or get frustrated and have to learn to control our own feelings by learning new coping skills, but in the meantime, they can be mean or nasty or belligerent and you feel what you feel.
Try not to beat yourself up too much. Yes he's freaking out and dealing with his decline, but so are you and you're entitled to your feelings. It's a learning process....for both of you, and while he still has his cognitive abilities it can bring you closer together like never before. It's the love that is left at the end of the day and all that you do for him comes from it. Try to have faith that you will learn, you will cope and with dedication and support we all will get through it.
Stay strong and stay connected.
Sending hugs.