Hello, I'm not sure of Il. Law ...look for a Senior Center help group, u could most likely Google one in your area of Il. Here n Colo. They can b put n home. After 3 days n hospital, r i have reg. POA...n can do it, U may have to call places that r n a bigger town then u r in, I know that's hard, we live n a small town 30 miles east of Co. Springs so if n when he gets to the point I'll have to get him n somewhere not as close as I like it... But we do what we can ! Ur Doc may have some places you could call, too... I probably didn't help a lot but at the point he is n your mom needs help it's so hard on the caregiver n so many ways, Bless you all, Peace n prayers !

We just had this happen with my father-in-law,,, 92 with Dementia.... Two years ago ,,, he said he always wanted to stay at home... Every time he was hospitalized ... the doctors documented that he had early memory loss,, early dementia but that he was still LEGALLY in his right mind. for now..... This past time.. He was so much worse... His Dementia had advanced to where he was having hallucinations,, didn't know where he was, who he was,,,, didn't know the date and time. and he kept wandering away confused...He was in the hospital first for medical treatment , then in the elderly psychiatric ward for about three months....This time...with no improvement THE DOCTOR SAID HE WAS NO LONGER ABLE TO MAKE DECISIONS FOR HIMSELF. The DOCTOR is the one who decides that the Medical Power of Attorney is now Activated....... THE DOCTOR has to make the decision.... You need to take your Dad to have a Medical Assessment to see if he can be declared incompetent and unable to make decisions for himself... If your doctor will sign off on that,,, THEN your mom can make the decisions..... EACH state has different laws... But basically this is the general idea.... In addition to the Medical Power of Attorney,,, You should have already talked to a lawyer about a legal Power of Attorney that deals, with finances and legal decisions as well.... You need to plan ahead for both your Dad and your Mom.. Otherwise,, you will end up spending a lot of money in court ....

you are correct. the facility just dosnt want to deal with it. as long as his DR has taken his right of making his own decisions. if not start ther

you can call adult protective service and talk with them without giving out names. I hope this helps

That is a very complicated situation. When he made that request he wouldn't have possibly known what condition he is in now. Your mother is his medical power of attorney, you would think she had the right to make a decision for him as he is not in right mind. I don't know about the legal side of it but I can certainly sympathize with you for having to be put in this tough position. My thoughts would be that if your mum could prove he is a danger to himself and needs care she might be able to over rule his wishes. She would need back up letters from doctors etc. If it is only that he is getting more difficult to deal with but not necessarily in danger it might be more difficult to go against his wishes. Morally I would try to imagine if he was his old self and knew his present condition and how it is affecting his family would he have the same wishes?